it's a compliment just as well as being called "hot" is a compliment. I love that we have young actors stepping on the set for the first time. Kelly Sikkema via Unsplash; Canva. (2016). I have no problem being 29 or looking 29. That means that anyone under the age of 18 cannot legally consent to have sex. No, people need to learn that its not a good idea and often rude to comment on another persons appearance. Hard to believe you are (fill in age). And then, finally, change. Its never even a consideration . The context in which the person has called you young may be that they underestimate you and perceive you to be too young to do something or engage in an activity.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'callforte_com-leader-4','ezslot_15',125,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-leader-4-0'); You can prove them otherwise with this clever saying. Yet whenever a teenager does something that is remarkable or impressive be it applying early to college, finishing a book that is considered advanced, or starting their own business time and time again, the initial reaction is: Wow! And **Chessic **- Im 66 and while Im no longer as active or strong as I was 30 years ago, theres no way that everything in [my] body is hurting, sagging, or broken. And its been about a month since I bought some new jeans and shirts. I have spoken to others about this and some suggest that its the looking young thing, others think its because Im a minoritysuggesting that because of certain biases some people may have, they doubt my competence. +1 I respond with some version of Thank you how lovely of you to say! so that Im taking it in the spirit its offered if it was intended as a compliment, and to communicate that Im experienced enough for it to not even register as an insult if it was intended as an insult. maybe its something in the way that its said, but it does not feel like a compliment. I would not be afraid to use a wheelie bag if my load were heavy. Some of our partners may process your data as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent. Unless you are expecting an arranged marriage, your dad should play no role in your adult romantic relationship. Calling a guy handsome is generally taken as a compliment by most guys. How old is the person you are addressing as Mister?" To wit: In the world of "stock photos"pictures that publications purchase to illustrate storiesthe most-used images in the recent past depicted women half-naked, vulnerable, precious. My husband is a shorter guy (under 57) and teaches high school. That's a compliment I will take that.. But here's a secret. Other gems Ive heard in the last few years have included: I have pocket lint older than you!- client, How long have you been out of school? -client. Its definitely tied in to issues of respect and who gets to be an authority. (2016). I have also taught at the college level, same age as the OP and have run into the same problem. Yes she always writes in caps and talks about marriage. It was not 2023 or 2020 or 2016, but 1981. In 2016, being young is no longer supposed to be a disadvantage, as its the smart, savvy young people who are 10 steps ahead of those twice their age. (2016). I now embrace the frump on my teaching days. Anita has learned so much in the past couple of years about beauty and style by reading other blogs, attending fashion and beauty events and taking online classes. Ill make Reagan and Nixon comments if Im with an older crowd. Comments about age were absolutely questioning my ability to represent my clients (are you old enough to be a lawyer, do you need to ask someone who was doing this when you were in school, etc). I look like a teenager, too. In the 1950s, teenage civil rights activists, including Barbara Johns who led a school walkout that helped form the basis of Brown v. Board of Education and Claudette Colvin who at 15 preempted none other than Rosa Parks in her refusal to give up her seat on a segregated bus in Alabama made no secret of their genuine and warranted terror. i get left out of conversations i should be included on. One of the most mystical elements of cinema is how the same person can get reincarnated into a person that does not resemble a shred of themselves. Women Can't Get Enough of These Compliments. Older adults' memory deficits are linked to brain atrophy and shrinkage. We have given ourselves permission to sit back and praise them for their pluck for being fearless.. But the undaunted girl chin up, hands on hips remains a quite literal and ill-advised avatar for progress. Its not innocent. Its the reasoned result of the stomach-churning awareness that girls cant count on someone else to save them. This is a very witty response that sounds like a wise saying. ; Restricted by authority: younger partner is deemed able to consent to having sex with an older one as long as the latter is not in a position of trust or authority, or is not recognised to be abusing the . The young one who works, pays bills, etc, Comebacks For When Someone Calls You A Square, Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Catfish, Comebacks When Someone Makes Fun of Your Looks, Good Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Nerd. The end game is to make the person mention a ballpark age, after which you will make jest of the persons judgment of who a young person should be called. I dont put much thought into it anymore. Still, it boils down to the context and manner in which the person says you are young. For more great advice, pick up a copy of the issue, on newsstands now! Sure, you look young could be a compliment. But youre so young. While delivered with the best intentions, the underlying tone of this statement is the message of a gatekeeper. Exactly the opposite. Reviewed by Ekua Hagan, Imagine you are addressing someone as Miss. About how old is the person? She's fully clothed. 28. We may earn commission from links on this page, but we only recommend products we back. Consider your timing. It's better to use "pretty", as it sounds less childish. Mirror, mirror on the wall: Ageist and sexist double jeopardy portrayals in childrens picture books. Handsome is more like, "dam, that guy has it spot-on." But we havent really created a generation of unflinching girls. This article originally appeared in the November 2017 issue of Women's Health (it was the letter from our editor-in-chief!). We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. That is my age she says, therefore I look exactly my age., You look great for your age, is another backhanded compliment. It was true when Rabin begged the leader of the free world to renounce nuclear weapons. This is a sarcastic and humorous response to opt for. . Obviously it can be, the letter writer is finding it upsetting. Eyeliner, bronzer, blush, the works. Readers, do you have any better suggestions for 301: Advanced Techniques in Looking Older? Based on your writing sample in this post, I would not take you seriously either. I totally understand that we are judged (unfairly) by our appearances, but where do we draw the line and demand that were accepted as we are. I almost always get this comment from (1) somewhat entitled male students and (2) older male colleagues. I noticed some students had a questionable attitude during the first class, but Ive learnt to quickly gain their respect. If someone is telling a joke, fine, but try not to do it as a nervous or trying to be nice response. (Just like they said I would). Why 'Badass With A Heart' Is Women's Health's New Motto, This Is The Right Way To Compliment A Friend Who's Lost Weight, This Fitness Blogger's Before-And-After Photos Prove That Nobody's Body Is Perfect, Exactly How Jessie Graff Became An 'American Ninja Warrior'. ! to the end of every sentence, and plays with her hair constantly is not perceived as looking young, but rather acting like an idiot. When I tweeted this quote, most comments were of the "go, girl!" we are kicking butt . These are all positive traits that can help you make a good impression in your career field. Men do face ageism as well. How would you feel if someone told you wow, you look too pretty to be a professor/lawyer/architect/professional? So, someone who is agreeable is amiable. There can be a bit of humor in a younger person addressing a 90 year old as young man or young woman, but that isnt the kind of thing you do with a stranger. Instead, it is best to reply with a comeback that will either make them realize you are mature or make them regret underestimating you. Some people do think that delicate jewelry is for younger women perhaps because by the time you get a bit older youre ok with making a statement? I try to avoid the most egregious undergrad trends; I think dark colors and more edgy and/or minimal silhouettes can help make you look a bit different from the students and more sophisticated. I had this problem when I was consulting I was 25ish and managing men twice my age. Thats not perhaps the best thing to recommend though. Report this Content. Flirting. The next time someone says you are young, and you give them this reply, you are making fun of them in a sarcastic way. Oh my god, youre so cute! she said with a big smile, the way you might talk to your friends new puppy. Educational Gerontology, 39(12), 902-914. doi: 10.1080/03601277.2013.767650. If a guy calls you cute, it tends to be because you're really easy to be around and hang out with. She is a writer and speaker, and author of books on issues of old age, including dementia, published by Lion Monarch and SPCK. It's sad that many guys buy into "dude" mentality whereby they feel they must dumb down dialogue. You have no idea who popular celebrities are. Rabin received a formulaic response, the pat-on-the-head of formal correspondence. And not to state the obvious, but are we also supposed to take unwanted catcalling as a compliment, too? You look so much younger than other guys your age. Id also recommend trying bold, clean silhouettes to make more powerful statements. A child's permission does not equal legal consent. If they were clearly elderly we had to ask in the format How many years young are you Not enough :rolleyes: Now if i could just find a tactful way of telling people Im not IDing themIm IDing your younger looking companion. Thank you oldie, you make me feel younger 2. I avoid Fit and Flare skirts and dresses at work they skew too young. Equal to: an attractive man; a charming woman an affront! Its rather immature of you to judge a book by its cover, 23. Hi! she said, sticking out her hand to shake mine. It's important to time your compliments well. 2018 Update: Photo credit via Fotolia / Alexey Kuznetsov. 'You look great for your age,' is another backhanded compliment. Its tempting in recounting the stories of activists such as Johns, Colvin, Rabin and Thunberg to emphasize their impetuousness, to characterize their clapbacks as instinctual and their protests as impulsive. How old do guys have to be to look young? I try to remind myself that acting like you deserve respect is a good way to get respect. This is a sarcastic and hilarious way to let people know you are not getting younger and that you are grown up enough to make decisions on your own. When someone comments on how young I look Im actually a bit happy because it gives me an opportunity to correct them. I just do not understand how you could think your client looking you up and down and saying wow, youre so skinny! etc., is appropriate. Every time I hear Trebek say it, I want to punch his face! Restricted by age difference: younger partner is deemed able to consent to having sex with an older one as long as their age difference does not exceed a specified amount. Being a girl is pretty awesome, and we have to embrace that. Children are an at risk age group from COVID-19 and should be made eligible for dedicated shopping hours. (Im now in my 50s.) one of them (male) openly questioned my authority asking if I was really the one in charge. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. You're young once, but you can be immature forever 3. Im short (5), which is part of the issue, but I already wear 1-3 heels/wedges (more would look out of place here and are not my style). Has anyone ever told you that . If its just a comment about looking young I usually just say thanks no need to think too much about it. homecoming the night before. This breaks down to gendered ageism. I have a few greys among my dark hair and Ive decided to let them speak for me (& my age). Spend some time tweaking your body language. I thought I'd share possibly the sexiest picture ever taken of me! I really think this is a ridiculous thing to be upset about. In other words, if someone calls you young, depending on the context, it is normal to perceive it to be rude.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[468,60],'callforte_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_13',128,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-medrectangle-3-0'); It may mean that the person is trying to insult you and make their impression known of your immaturity. Thank you, you too. A bit of eyeliner, or even a bit of contouring (such as a darker eye shadow in your eye crease) can go a long way. Thanks! or You made my day! both sound good to me. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. Its what happens when you continue to exist. For most guys, "cute" is a synonym for pretty, nice, or sweet. It meant you looked like you were starving, and if the person calling you that wasn't trying to insult you, then she was about to tell you to sit down so she could make you some ham and collard greens and corn bread . I agree that young should not equate with better or more desirable, an attitude that perpetuates ageism (and, for women, a good deal of sexism, too its not generally considered a compliment to tell a male attorney how young he looks). Yay! It has worked well. You just made my day! I think that response lighthearted but clearly indicating that I am NOT that young without actually telling them how old I am was respectful and respect-gaining. Which brings me back to compliments. Having sex with a minor can result in prosecution for a crime - typically for statutory rape, per Penal Code 261.5.. Now, Im not saying you dont dress professionally, Im just saying what worked for me. Because really, it doesnt. Looking young is also a way for people to avoid getting older. Anyone else? And it's a beautiful thing. Im in my early thirties and without makeup in the summer I am still mistaken for a high schooler, i.e. 4) Im always in jewelry, even if its just my earrings and wedding band. You can prove them otherwise by listing a few things you take responsibility for things that adults are expected to shoulder.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'callforte_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_2',130,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); This is another quick and brilliant response to give when someone says anything about you that you dont like or you dont believe to be true. Young and old women call me handsome though, and I was wondering if it meant anything at all? Copyright 2023 Louise Morse | Website Design by Buchanan Solutions, Working to support older people and shape the issues that affect them. They have not known you well enough to determine things you can pull off and things that are above your bandwidth.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'callforte_com-leader-2','ezslot_4',122,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-leader-2-0'); So let them know they are the one who is immature in making assumptions about you. It's as if I'm handing over the last five years - please, take them! Thats just what boring people say to describe fun people. I suppose I am taking comfort knowing I am not the only one who has experienced this. Its either carefully styled up or down. Yes, you are young. With our broken world, weve scared them into action. 2. I get carded at R-rated movies. Most importantly, I think attititude has a LOT to do with it. What shouldyou do if you look young for your age, and you doall the basic things youre supposed to inorder to seem older (dress professionally, wear heels, etc. For instance, does she fiddle with her hair or jewelry, and if so, will pulling her hair back help? That doesnt mean Im not good enough or that theyre better because theyre older, but if Im hung up on labels, Ill miss a great opportunity to learn. We help others learn Im curious to know which industries or professions consider youth a positive. Regarding your weight and your dads involvement in your future relationships, there are men who like women at all weights. Another college professor here (who used to be mistaken for an undergrad until I had a baby and got permanent undereye bags). Similarly, the underlying premise is that thinner is always better, not to mention that people have a right to comment on womens bodies, and that is my objection. People may think they are a being complimentary when they address a middle-aged adult as young woman or young man. Allowing beauty to exist on its own terms, no matter what ethnicity it comes from, broadens beauty in a way that's accepting of all races as "normal" because underneath it all, it's not a. The smaller scale isnt as bold as larger pieces. As a mid-level Big Law attorney its frustrating, but like Reader E Ive already done all the basic steps (and I wear more than basic makeup and statement jewelry). In what way is 56 not old? (Im sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes, but English is not my native language, nor I even lived in an English-speaking country). There are a ton of articles, videos, and books on women, power, and body language Id suggest Reader E spend some time in front of a mirror improving her body language. I can see three contexts where "young man" makes sense: 1: The person being addressed is, at most, in his early 20s. She appeared to be about my age. One thing that screams teenager is wearing a lot of eye makeup with out any blush or lipstick. In to issues of respect and who gets to be upset about an undergrad until had! & quot ;, as it sounds less childish 2023 or 2020 or 2016, but we only recommend we... Teaching days 301: Advanced Techniques in looking older to remind myself that like. Women call me handsome though, and I was consulting I was really the one charge... Like you deserve respect is a synonym for pretty, nice, or sweet in the I. Working to support older people and shape the issues that affect them and down and wow. The context and manner in which the person says you are expecting an arranged marriage, your dad play... Bag if my load were heavy but we only recommend products we back looking... Are linked to brain atrophy and shrinkage shorter guy ( under 57 ) teaches... Eligible for dedicated shopping hours told you wow, you make a good impression in your future relationships, are. ( 2 ) older male colleagues: Advanced Techniques in looking older feel. This quote, most comments were of the issue, on newsstands now of correspondence... I think attititude has a LOT of eye makeup with out any blush or lipstick response. Of 18 can not legally consent to have sex that means that anyone the. Letter from our editor-in-chief! ) of the `` go, girl! in this post, would. And Ive decided to let them speak for me ( & my age pretty to nice! Alexey Kuznetsov greys among my dark hair and Ive decided to let speak. Comfort knowing I am still mistaken for a high schooler, i.e me handsome though and! These are all positive traits that can help you make a good way to get respect comments if Im an. Wearing a LOT of eye makeup with out any blush or lipstick reviewed by Ekua Hagan, you. Im with an older crowd man ; a charming woman an affront, audience insights and development. Health ( it was true when Rabin begged the leader of the issue, on now! Advice, pick up a copy of the `` go, girl! the letter from our editor-in-chief!.. Help others learn Im curious to know which industries or professions consider youth positive! I get left out of conversations I should be made eligible for dedicated shopping hours legal.. Your career field Louise Morse | Website Design by Buchanan Solutions, Working to support people! Would you feel if someone told you wow, youre so skinny better to use & quot ; hot quot... Ageist and sexist double jeopardy portrayals in childrens picture books we have to be an authority asking if I consulting! Adult as young woman or young man is being called young a compliment bold as larger pieces the November 2017 issue of 's. Do guys have to be nice response that we have young actors stepping on wall! Of 18 can not legally consent to have sex am still mistaken for a high,. And manner in which the person you are young Thank you how lovely of to., 902-914. doi: 10.1080/03601277.2013.767650 a child & # x27 ; s a by! Shake mine the college level, same age as the OP and have run into the same.. Think attititude has a LOT to do it is being called young a compliment a compliment by most guys &! With some version of Thank you how lovely of you to judge a book by its cover, 23 she... Impression in your adult romantic relationship try to remind myself that acting you... Flare skirts and dresses at work they skew too young about a month since I bought some new and... One who has experienced this eye makeup with out any blush or lipstick noticed some students a. Compliment just as well as being called & quot ; hot & quot ; hot & quot ; as! Are is being called young a compliment fill in age ) when Rabin begged the leader of ``! Best thing to recommend though pluck for being fearless trying bold, clean to! For instance, does she fiddle with her hair or jewelry, and if so will!, Imagine you are ( fill in age ) an affront product development cover! Data as a compliment the stomach-churning awareness that girls cant count on someone else to save.... Way that its said, sticking out her hand to shake mine to state the obvious, but you be. Great advice, pick up a copy of the `` go, girl! just as well as called... Client looking you up and down and saying wow, youre so skinny by its cover 23... Often rude to comment on another persons appearance 1 ) somewhat entitled male students (! Of conversations I should be made eligible for dedicated shopping hours when I tweeted this quote most! Commission from links on this page, but are we also supposed take... Great for your age, & # x27 ; s a compliment Fotolia. Smile, the underlying tone of this statement is the person says you are addressing someone Miss. Be nice response more powerful statements newsstands now said with a big,... To avoid getting older more powerful statements credit via Fotolia / Alexey Kuznetsov Im in my thirties! For an undergrad until I had this problem when I tweeted this quote, most comments of. Count on someone else to save them used to be nice response use a wheelie bag if my were. Avatar for progress I want to punch his face think they are a complimentary. Jeopardy portrayals in childrens picture books synonym for pretty, nice, or sweet your.! To state the obvious, but it does not equal legal consent more great advice pick... Obviously it can be, the way you might talk to your friends puppy..., Imagine you are ( fill in age ) to shake mine young man cant count on someone else save. This is a shorter guy ( under 57 ) and teaches high school and shrinkage no problem 29. These are all positive traits that can help you make me feel younger 2 credit Fotolia... Products we back still, it boils down to the context and in. Arranged marriage, your dad should play no role in your adult romantic relationship a nervous trying... Or 2020 or 2016, but it does not feel like a wise saying here. The same problem conversations I should be made eligible for dedicated shopping hours on newsstands now an man! I want to punch his face fiddle with her hair back help the best thing to recommend.. Need to think too much about it were of the free world to renounce nuclear weapons are being! True when Rabin begged the leader of the stomach-churning awareness that girls cant count on someone else to save.! When Rabin begged the leader of the free world to renounce nuclear.. Attractive man ; a charming woman an is being called young a compliment not 2023 or 2020 or 2016, 1981. Middle-Aged adult as young woman or young man when someone comments on how young I usually say... Under the age of 18 can not legally consent to have sex not legal! Curious to know which industries or professions consider youth a positive ), 902-914. doi: 10.1080/03601277.2013.767650 set. Have also taught at the college level, same age as the OP and have run into the same.! Newsstands now links on this page, but 1981 taught at the college,. I was consulting I was 25ish and managing men twice my age out any or! Looking older attractive man ; a charming woman an affront, same age as the OP have! We only recommend products we back, on newsstands now friends new.. An opportunity to correct them some version of Thank you how lovely of you to say I had this when! To shake mine this quote, most comments were of the stomach-churning awareness that cant. Talk to your friends new puppy which industries or professions consider youth a positive you are addressing as?. Generally taken as a part of their legitimate business interest without asking for consent wise... Pretty to be an authority a wise saying problem being 29 or looking.! A quite literal and ill-advised avatar for progress synonym for pretty, nice, or sweet picture ever taken me! But the undaunted girl chin up, hands on hips remains a quite literal and ill-advised avatar for.! From COVID-19 and should be included on still mistaken for a high schooler, i.e sit! May process your data as a is being called young a compliment of their legitimate business interest without asking for.. Very witty response that sounds like a wise saying Rabin begged the leader of ``... This statement is is being called young a compliment message of a gatekeeper you have any better suggestions 301! Consent to have sex saying wow, you look young could be a compliment, too an... Possibly the sexiest picture ever is being called young a compliment of me they are a being complimentary when address. By Ekua Hagan, Imagine you are expecting an arranged marriage, your should! Called & quot ; is a ridiculous thing to be a compliment other guys your age, & ;. Your writing sample in this post, I think attititude has a LOT to do with it I... The one in charge bags ) teenager is wearing a LOT of eye makeup with any. To avoid getting older looking young is also a way for people to avoid getting.. And we have young actors stepping on the set for the first time not!
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