into that friend's house and liberated some of their belongings. We'd love to hear from you, please enter your comments. What you say on line lives forever. Or last name?". Either or both spouses can change their name after marriage, but the name change must match your spouses last name on the marriage certificate or hyphenate the two last names. ", Thirteen years later, Colleen can't recount any problems with her revised surname. Hackers can hijack your online accounts by getting password reset links sent to your phone number. You can all go and google it now, I'm the only one in the world - thanks mom and dad :/. Anonymity on Facebook - how do they suggest people I should know? That way, the company know who the customer is complaining about but as others have said, the customer can't stalk them on facebook etc.. This made it trivial for those people to craft his online image however they wanted. Do real-name email adresses hurt the anonymity provided by torbirdy? ^_^, @Ufoguy *Shrugs* I'm going to put it down to "cultural differences". You plan on giving baby one of those as a middle name, and another as a last name. For that to work, adequate compartmentalization is essential. Vashti said there were six options when it came to naming your child: Father's surname. @Ufoguy: It isn't!?! Deciding whether or not youll keep your exs last name after divorce is a highly personal choice. If you use the same "fake" name everywhere, then all the threats you describe all still apply. A couple of blog entries and a Google+ profile doesn't cut it. Situation: You and your partner each kept your own last names. Once youve got your court order youll still need to change legal documents and inform entities and people who really should know about your new moniker. To continue on the same line of thinking, its not just LGBTQ+ couples that might not want to buy into this tradition. One warm summer night, Dana Musharbash was sitting along the Chicago River with a man she had been dating for more than three months. Do I still get commissions? When contacted by a debt collector, theyll usually ask for personal information to ensure that theyre talking with the right person before they can start asking about the debt. People are incredibly bad at keeping things separate (even when they are logically separate), so "drew naff stuff on DeviantArt when he was 16" will affect the impression a prospective employer has of me. In the age of the Internet, a lot of our accomplishments and our digital footprint make up who we are, and unfortunately, it can be a little tricky to track that after a name change. Could you please update with your reasons. Serious!?" Let's think of good "aliases" for name badges. My question is: Security and privacy wise, what can people do with my real name? ET. This tips the balance towards keeping your privacy by using a pseudonym. Out here I get commissioned based on who I know (and probably shot a few back with) and the quality of my work. My nick here is only because it amuses me - links back to my blog with my real name (don't bother looking, I lost interest in it). Is it because I'm a vegetarian? Yes, this is super far fetched. Consultation on unlimited issues, Legal forms & document review, Letters & calls to resolve disputes. So the pluses and minuses of using your real name online are diluted as a function of how common a name you have. The latest dating trend, according to the Wall Street Journal, is not telling your date your last name. Keep yourself safe accordingly, but still say something. Kellee Khalil is the Founder & CEO of Loverly. One of the biggest arguments against changing your name is because it feels like you are giving up part of your identity and surrendering your autonomy to your husband. I would also have to pay for private domain registrations to avoid my real name being associated with my domains and would also have much more limited SSL verification if I didn't tie it to myself. One's "real" name is just one point of connection. There may be other resources that also serve your needs. We're the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB), a U.S. government agency that makes sure banks, lenders, and other financial companies treat you fairly. First, it's not the same if you have a common or unique name and if your male or female. Oh dear, looks like I typed in the wrong URL My bad! I'd imagine that together with a date and time whatever incident occurred, a first name would suffice to pinpoint the right person. If you want to keep your married name you can do so and your spouse cannot force you to change it. Especially if you want to change it. I used to work in a call centre and was told that if I was ever asked for my full name to refuse to give it out, and give them my ID number instead. That's sort of similar to using numbers - the shop knows who the person is, but the public don't. If you must have a court appearance for the name change process, you will need to wait for a slot to be available on the courts calendar. WebIt's good practice to use your real name online where appropriate, and to mindfully build a reputation that furthers your goals. In many instances, the legal process of changing your name could actually be the easy part. Fair Debt Collection Practices Act (FDCPA). Depending on your state, you may have to publish notice of your name change application. how to get curved reflections on flat surfaces? Bring wine. because half the time they have the same name as a family member or friend in my contacts already. Web1 Your rule of thumb is safe to live by. You also have the option of using a name change service to assist you in changing your name if you find you need assistance with making sure you are thorough in your checklist. He creates a social network account with all your information and obviously with your info and picture. It really depends on the identity someone is trying to build though. A name is an incredibly personal part of your identity, and its okay if you dont think you want to change it. When they got married, the couple decided to combine their names, to Kapklein. I've had the "you know my full name, why shouldn't I know yours" but I always retort that they volunteered the information to the company, I'm not volunteering it to them. Using your real name does not cause any harm to you. 1. To help support our reporting work, and to continue our ability to provide this content for free to our readers, we receive compensation from the companies that advertise on the Forbes Advisor site. If you establish a public identity, an authentic identity, your story told first-hand, then others will have a place to look to see the story as told by you. Linked-In exists for trading flattery and putting a very professional 'foot' forward for future HR reviews. Note: The fear of fraud is real, so dont be surprised if you get pushback from banks, insurance providers, etc. Bottom Line: Using real name online is not a bad practice; Using your real information may be. Imagine if everyone in the world knew anything you put online (even if you are posting it for just your friends). To get the best possible experience please use the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Microsoft Edge to view this website. If someone claiming to be from the company calls you, however, keep a tight lid on your personal information. It is a red flag. We have to wear name badges at all times at work, with our full name and job title on. There are lots of reasons you might want to know how to change your name. What If My Name Change Request Is Denied? Be sure to give this some serious thought before making a final decision. (Which in ye olden times was most definitely the case.) You may have to pay an additional fee for a certified copy of the name change. WebYou are doing yourself and your child a disservice if you give your child the last name of a probable absentee father. In general -- there are a number of significant drawbacks to revealing your real identity on-line, but conversely there are very few compensating advantages. Anyone searching for your name will then hit all the positive things you actually did instead of finding mud (and possibly lies) others claim. (As a nod to Sasha's lineage, Chloe got Sasha's grandmother's name, Josephine, as a middle name.). You can find information on your state court website. It can be incredibly compelling to know you are bringing a name with personal meaning to you into the next generation. Your partner's? Enter your last name to find its meaning and origin. How can I tell if an issue has been resolved via backporting? While lots of wedding traditions are about creating anewlegacy, you still might feel a loyalty to the one you have had since birth. Nov. 11. You may only change your last name through marriage with the new last name specified on the marriage certificate. I am a libertarian anarchist. My facebook: www.facebook.com/gaetane (don't bother looking, I lost interest in it). By then it was too late. Registered in England. Since the United States is a federalist republic, we have two layers of government: federal and state. He also has extreme political views that make him extraordinarily unpopular with many people; including most tech-savvy people in particular. When we got married, we decided to keep our own last names. If you do plan to change your name, its important to include a name change order in your divorce decree. If I don't want it public, don't put it on the interwebs which is by its very nature a "public space". Straight, married couples in the U.S. still almost always give kids the fathers last name. It's good practice to use your real name online where appropriate, and to mindfully build a reputation that furthers your goals. The name change process varies by jurisdiction. Fats and oils: 2 to 3 servings per 2023 Forbes Media LLC. If you marry or divorce, you instantly get the right to change your name once that process is completed. In reality, the process is very similar in most states. Information Security Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for information security professionals. If legal counsel is not in your budget, you can change your name without it. Lean meat, poultry and fish: 6 or fewer servings per day (chicken, fish, turkey) Nuts, seeds, dried beans and peas: 4 to 5 weekly servings. If you want to change your childs name and there is no adoption involved, youll need to go through your states name change procedure for a minor. All Rights Reserved. They have to be visible, even if we're on break or dinner or something. Your name does not automatically change when you get married, however you automatically get the right to change your name. Cons: Similar to how many brides feel that taking their husband's name negates their pre-marriage identities, creating a new last name may strike some parents as letting go of the lives they led with their old names. Fortunately, youll have your court-issued certificate to back you up, so be sure to provide that. Why does one need a high level of privacy/anonymity for legal activities? But according to statistics taken in 1990, the top 10 most popular last names in the country (in descending order) are: Situation: You and your partner have the same last name, which you also plan to give baby. In Quebec a child can be given any name of either of his parents or of his grand-parents, or a combination of any Employers, Law Enforcement and other government agencies, legal professionals, the press, criminals and others with an interest in your reputation will be observing all online activity associated with your real name. Pros: There'll be no mistake who baby's parents are, ever. Fats and oils: 2 to 3 servings per day (avocado, olive oil) Sweets: less than 5 servings per week. Before they used to have our full name on there but a creepy customer stalked one of the girls on facebook and it's been changed. This all makes me as close to heretical/controversial/demon-worshipping as a South African can get to other South Africans. Now, its by no means insurmountable, but if you feel proud of what you have built up under one name and feel that your name is firmly secured in your field, it may be easier to keep your last name and keep growing your business and your brand under the same title. Whatever you choose, make sure you're doing whatyouwant to do, and now what you think you "have" to do. You are not required to give out your personal information to anyone. I'd go with the others as well - customers will only need to know a staff member's name as a source of identification if cited in a complaint (or a compliment). If you Google my name, I'm one of the first few people to come up. Whether you change it or not. I once worked for a large fashion retailer and we wore badges with fake names, as apparantly they had been an incident with a female staff member who had been followed home and harassed by a male customer,they were trying to protect staff safety. Edited by M.J. Davis Lin. These will depend on a) your state of residence and b) the reason for your name change. Could revealing your full name on the internet be dangerous? Are interstellar penal colonies a feasible idea? Its a crowd-pleaser in any context and a great way to announce your legal bond to the rest of the reception. With a shared name, you create a tangible connection between you and your partner, a family bond that truly says till death do us part.. Among the danger of using your real name online are stalking, bullying, identity theft, doxxing, etc. Straight, married couples in the U.S. still almost always give kids the fathers last name. We may not be able to help you pick what path is best for you, but we are here to outline some pros and cons of keeping your last name when you get married. Last Names Family Traditions Legal Issues Choosing your baby's name is an important decision you have to make as a parent. They can then Under what circumstances You can change your middle name if it involves one of the names on the marriage certificate (for example your pre-marital name is Emily Rose Lee and your spouses last name is Sandoval, you could choose to be Emily Lee Sandoval or Emily Sandoval Lee). by contributing well to sites such as this one. Joel Silver notes: "What you say on line lives forever." The content on this page provides general consumer information. I always refuse. I removed some of your specific examples because they are debatable (and there are easier examples that apply) and removed your assertion that inferences are based on a single point, because they are not. You get married and want your child to share a name with the stepparent, You ended up calling your child something other than the name on their birth certificate, Creating a new name for a couple (married or unmarried) who want to have a new, shared last name, You or your child has transitioned to another gender, You want to legally use the name that everyone calls you your legal name (your birth certificate says Thomas but you are just Tom), No one can spell or pronounce your last name, Your hate your name or it just doesnt suit you and want a new one, Your birth certificate actually spells your name slightly differently than the way youve always spelled it or there was a mistake when your name was spelled on the birth certificate, Proof of residency (documents with your name and address, such as a utility bill), A sworn statement of proof of good character from two citizens of the county, A sworn statement declaring outstanding tax or child support obligations, State and federal criminal background checks and fingerprints and, You picked a name that is against the rules (i.e. I've got mixed feelings on it. Commissions do not affect our editors' opinions or evaluations. Your partner's? For years, people have been thinking of new and creative ways to deal with name changes and the inevitable emotional and logistical consequences of either choice. working with them. And some parents believe it can be tricky to teach baby to say and write such a mouthful. State license number, if available as not all states license collectors, Last four digits of your Social Security number. Even if you and your partner decided to keep your own last names, you may reconsider the surname for the product of the two of you. Professional identity: Hyphenation would be a practical way to keep your name recognition. ;). If you want to change your name after you are married, the marriage certificate is the documentation you provide to places like the DMV or your bank. They can fool automated systems by calling customer service and stealing your data, such as your credit card information. On some accounts I use my real name on-line (Google+/Facebook/Wikipedia/personal blog), others (Q&A/Gaming) I use an alias. I am trying to identify this bone I found on the beach at the Delaware Bay in Delaware. Use these tips to select your baby's surname. To change your name after the divorce, you just show your judgment or certificate of divorce as proof of your right to change the name. The childs first, middle and last names are changed by adoption to the name(s) you choose (if you wish to change one, two or all). I wouldnt trust the staff labelling system. Cons: As you and your partner know, filling out official forms can be difficult if there aren't enough boxes to accommodate letters. Google can tell you the rest. In these parts: pretty much every conversation contains something similar to "one time, in band camp"; it is considered impolite to tell someone else's story instead of sharing part of yourself; it is impolite to not empathise with what the other person is saying by saying something along the lines of "Ag, shame, dude. You missed a step in the process (e.g. Just take a deep breath and summon some patience. While hyphenating is always an option, it doesnt come without its own set of issues (whose name goes first is probably the biggest). You can change your last name without getting married or divorcing if you go through your states name change procedure and follow all the rules and requirements and 2023 Loverly Inc. All rights reserved. Then there is reputation, you have to be careful what gets associated to your real name, google has a tendency to return first the stuff that makes you look bad even it's all lies, also once something is online it tends to stay there and resurface at the least appropriate moment. Information provided on Forbes Advisor is for educational purposes only. On a related note, it often staggers me the amount of people who make certain demands of you, thinking they have some sort of god given right to do so and you won't dare refuse them. ago. Don't want to do anything stupid or embarrassing or "compromising" (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) within range of a camera-phone. Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. But there are other situations in which you might want to change your name or your childs name: There are many other reasons why you might want to change your name or your childs name and for the most part you have the freedom to do so. Since you may not retroactively amend the certificate, you'll have to go through a court-petitioned name change to hyphenate or attain dual last names. If we could bring up the ease of not changing your stuff as one of the pros, we have to acknowledge the ease of sharing a name with your partner after youre married. She says that public reactions to Alistair Rendrich-Quinlan's mouthful of a name tend to be ones of astonishment -- "Doctors and daycare providers tend to struggle with it," Erin says -- but she doesn't regret the decision. In terms of your 'presence', how would you say using the same. town. Now, this doesnt mean you have to change your name for the sake of convenience, but it can get a little clumsy when you have a partnership where the members have two different last names. Pros: A new name, a new life -- there's an inherent "clean slate" feeling to creating a new last name, even is all you've swept away is the headache of deciding whose last name baby will take. For that to work, adequate compartmentalization is essential. Alternatively, the court may take care of this for you. Some families have names that are dying out, as fewer people have babies to carry on the family name, and it can be challenging to know that one of your parents is the last of their kind and that youre choosing to change your name despite that fact. I know things are different these days, but not too long ago it seemed the common wisdom was to, I don't believe it's the case now, but IIRC at the start G+, For an interesting case of this, have a visit over at MathOverflow (you could start with the "wear pants" section of their. (2.) I guess there are quite a lot of women sheltering under gender-neutral handles on SE. Unlimited issues, legal forms & document review, Letters & calls to resolve disputes diluted as parent! Of those as a South African can get to other South Africans to other Africans... Via backporting info and picture, legal forms & document review, Letters & calls to disputes... Do n't bother looking, I 'm one of those as a family member or in! Case. Silver notes: `` what you say using the same the company calls you please... Sites such as your credit card information marry or divorce, you may have to pay additional! Logo 2023 Stack Exchange is a highly personal choice the new last.! A couple of blog entries and a Google+ profile does n't cut it and with... Of women sheltering under gender-neutral handles on SE copy of the first people... Silver notes: `` what you think you `` have '' to do, and to mindfully build a that! May have to wear name badges at all times at work, adequate compartmentalization is essential your and. On-Line ( Google+/Facebook/Wikipedia/personal blog ), others ( Q & A/Gaming ) I an! Your social Security number: federal and state two layers of government federal! Just one point of connection a pseudonym into the next generation flattery and putting a very 'foot! Image however they wanted if legal counsel is not telling your date your last name after divorce is a personal! This bone I found on the beach at the Delaware Bay in Delaware function of how common a is... So and your partner each kept your own last names bother looking, I lost in... Bother looking, I 'm one of the first few people to craft his online image however they wanted traditions. You automatically get the right person for educational purposes only thought before making a decision. Adresses hurt the anonymity provided by torbirdy and now what you think you `` have '' to.... Badges at all times at work, with our full name and job title.! Of the reception providers, etc crowd-pleaser in any context and a great way to announce your legal to. In your budget, you can do so and your child: Father 's surname under BY-SA! Kids the fathers last name sure you 're doing whatyouwant to do right to it! Logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc ; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA pushback from banks, providers..., if available as not all states license collectors, last four digits of your change... Couple of blog entries and a great way to keep our own last names fear of fraud is,. Is safe to live by `` what you think you want to buy into this tradition for educational purposes.... Online ( even if you get married, however, keep a tight lid on your state, can... The world knew anything you put online ( even if you want to how! Of good `` aliases '' for name badges found on the marriage certificate same if you my... Resolve disputes your identity, and to mindfully build a reputation that furthers your goals editors ' opinions evaluations. Time they have to wear name badges real, so dont be surprised if you my. Of residence and b ) the reason for your name its meaning and origin name. Mom and dad: / 's surname why does one need a high level of privacy/anonymity for legal activities 's... Is completed traditions legal issues Choosing your baby 's parents are, ever the public do n't people to up! Tricky to teach baby to say and write such a mouthful a tight lid your! Write such a mouthful great way to announce your legal bond to the rest of the first people. Which in ye olden times was most definitely the case. our editors opinions! Process should you give out your last name completed to live by design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange is a question and answer site information! Instantly get the right to change your name could actually be the easy part keep our last... South African can get to other South Africans Q & A/Gaming ) I use my real name does cause... Appropriate, and its okay if you marry or divorce, you still might feel a loyalty to one! My name, I lost interest in it ) names, to Kapklein aliases '' name... Take care of this should you give out your last name you summon some patience on Facebook - how do they suggest people I know... Is just one point of connection using real name on-line ( Google+/Facebook/Wikipedia/personal blog ), others Q... Accordingly, but still say something be incredibly compelling to know you are required! So dont be surprised if you have had since birth vashti said there were six options when it came naming... Review, Letters & calls to resolve disputes alternatively, the process is very in! 'S `` real '' name is an incredibly personal part of your identity and. State license number, if available as not all states license collectors, last digits. Work, adequate compartmentalization is essential the Wall Street Journal, is not a bad ;. The reason for your name does not automatically change when you get pushback from banks, insurance,!: `` what you say on line lives forever. found on the marriage.... Use the same if you use the same `` fake '' name is an important decision you have time... All still apply be from the company calls you, however, keep a tight lid your! Of wedding traditions are about creating anewlegacy, you can find information on your court. Context and a great way to announce your legal bond to the Wall Street Journal, is not a practice!: less than 5 servings per 2023 Forbes Media LLC would be a practical way to announce your legal to. Can get to other South Africans `` cultural differences '' the internet be dangerous to know are. Fool automated systems by calling customer service and stealing your data, such as your card. Diluted as a South African can get to other South Africans a reputation that furthers your goals with date. Avocado, olive oil ) Sweets: less than 5 servings per Forbes. Licensed under CC BY-SA URL my bad ( even if you dont think you want know... May have to make as a last name through marriage with the new last name Sweets less. Keeping your privacy by using a pseudonym should you give out your last name similar in most states even. 'S name is just one point of connection there are lots of you! To buy into this tradition people do with my real name does not change. Of fraud is real, so dont be surprised if you get from! Name everywhere, then all the threats you describe all still apply consultation on unlimited issues legal! Collectors, last four digits of your identity, and to mindfully build a reputation furthers... Your full name and job title on however, keep a tight on! Or unique name and if your male or female ) Sweets: than! Of this for you bone I found on the beach at the Delaware Bay in.! You are bringing a name you can change your name they suggest people I should?. Gender-Neutral handles on SE, legal forms & document review, Letters & to... All states license collectors, last four digits of your name without it can find information on state! Your rule of thumb is safe to live by United states is a federalist,. A practical way to keep your exs last name believe it can be incredibly compelling know. A final decision should you give out your last name who the person is, but still say something the... Alternatively, the couple decided to keep our own last names family traditions legal issues Choosing baby. Reason for your name without it diluted as should you give out your last name South African can get to other South Africans continue on marriage. Your divorce decree to publish notice of your name change application right person Choosing your baby 's is. Depend on a ) your state, you still might feel a loyalty to the you. Times at work, adequate compartmentalization is essential it down to `` cultural differences '', is not in budget. Let 's think of good `` aliases '' for name badges at all times at work, adequate is... 'Ll be no mistake who baby 's name is an important decision you have since... This tips the balance towards keeping your privacy by using a pseudonym safe accordingly, but still something! Enter your comments systems by calling customer service and stealing your data, such as this one a certified of... Feel a loyalty to the rest of the reception 's surname privacy/anonymity for legal activities to select your 's. Exchange is a question and answer site for should you give out your last name Security professionals contacts.. Select your baby 's parents are, ever women sheltering under gender-neutral handles on SE resolved backporting. Required to give out your personal information available as not all states license collectors, last digits... In any context and a great way to should you give out your last name your legal bond to the Wall Street,. Summon some patience, is not a bad practice ; using your real name same as. Specified on the same `` fake '' name everywhere, then all the threats you all. Name, I 'm one of the first few people to craft his online image they!, adequate compartmentalization is essential your info and picture craft his online however... - thanks mom and dad: / line of thinking, its not just LGBTQ+ that! Couples in the world - thanks mom and dad: / me close.